


In another life, we could’ve been better.

by RainbowJeff



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: APPARENTLY I REALLY LIKE KILLING LUZ, Angst, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, I repeat, Regret, Time Travel, just for a little though, rivals to ? fic, she does not stay dead, she doesn’t stay dead, we’ll see
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:00:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27580372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowJeff/pseuds/RainbowJeff
Summary: Amity and Luz never became friends.
Relationships: Amity Blight/Luz Noceda
Comments: 51
Kudos: 334





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> *drops this fic like a bomb and runs the fuck away*
> 
> Not me posting another one (two?) shot!
> 
> Please please please listen to Aftermath by Caravan Palace while reading, most of my fics are inspired by music and the tone is very important for this piece. 
> 
> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oJvoeAIq2Po

Amity feels it all the time.

_Regret._

She lies awake at night, wondering why she’s done the things that she’s done, why she’s made the mistakes she’s made.

Regret is a funny thing, she thinks. You think you’re making the right choice in that moment, and you let a few angry, biting words slip out, and it feels _good._ You feel satisfied, that you’ve let it out. All the anger, the pain washing over some innocent person who’s done nothing to deserve it. It feels _good._

Then, all alone in your bed, you think-

_Why?_

Amity’s felt that moment of regret many times over the past years.

All alone in her bed, when the anger has died away, she’s wondered why. Why did I do that? Why did I push her like that? 

She never used to feel regret. Her words never used to haunt her. With Boscha and Skara by her side, she was untouchable. She’d never feel this guilt. She’d never lie awake at night wondering-

_Why did I do that?_

So yes, the regret is new, but it’s not. It’s an ever present ache, a constant in her life, for what was it now? Three years? Four?

She never used to feel regret before Luz. 

_A human._

Soft eyes, an open heart, kind words, innocent. Yes, she can admit it now, the human changed her. Turned her from an ice cold witch, someone who’s gaze could cut people to ribbons, to someone who questioned themself in the mirror. To someone who would wake up in the morning with tear stains and a weight pressing against her chest.

Luz was the only person who made her _doubt._

Amity hated doubting herself.

At her core, she was self assured, knew exactly where she was headed and how she would get there. She was always top, first, the best, and everyone knew it. She would be part of the Emperor’s Coven, and then she’d become Emperor Belos’s closest and most trusted advisor. She knew it, her parents knew it, and everyone else knew it. Amity walked the halls with a confident gleam in her eyes, footsteps never halting or stumbling.

She _didn’t_ doubt herself.

Of course, it wasn’t easy to be the best. The pressure from her parents, combined with the high expectations of her teachers lead to a life of work. She worked hard, and eventually clawed her way to the top. And she stayed there.

Until Luz.

The human, somehow, _unexplainably,_ earned Half-a-Witch, of _all_ people, Amity’s top student badge. It _was_ hers, she’d even written her name on the back of it in permanent marker a couple months back. As stupid as it sounds now, she felt she’d lost her soul, or at least an arm and a leg. Something burned through her when the teacher removed her badge and gave it to Willow.

_Jealousy._

It was an unfamiliar emotion to her. Amity never had anything to be jealous of.

She hated it.

The green monster roared in her chest, demanding repentance. She’d felt a fury simmer deep in her stomach, begging to be unleashed. Amity swore that if she ever saw the human again, it would.

A month later, the unexpected happened.

For the first time in history, a human had been admitted into Hexide. The news had reverberated through the hallways, spreading like wildfire, exciting students and starting rumors. The monster had curled itself around her heart, spreading green poison through her as it growled. Amity had grabbed Boscha and Skara by the arm, leading them to find the human, fury still bubbling in her.

They’d spotted her, with Half-a-Witch and some kid she vaguely knew as Augustus. She had felt the monster take over, green clouding her vision and her judgement.

Amity roughly shoved the human into one of the nearby lockers, feeling a small spike of pleasure at the pained grunt that escaped her lips. She’d looked up at Amity with wide, fearful eyes.

_“Never come near me. Never take what’s mine from me again.”_

Oh, how’d she come to regret those words.

Luz had been confused by her anger, by the rage that she hadn’t earned. She’d felt the human’s eyes on her as the three of them walked away, but couldn’t care less. The green monster had purred, satisfied.

Later that evening, an ache had flared up in her when she remembered the fear, the pain in Luz’s eyes. She clenched her teeth, and vowed to forget.

Yes. She would forget.

Yet, because life wouldn’t let Amity have her way, the human had shown up in her abomination class. Amity’s class. Amity’s territory, Amity’s turf, Amity’s refuge and sanctuary. Of course, the human had come and mucked that all up.

Being the good, role model student that she was, Amity ignored her and went on to answer all the teacher’s questions, earning a beaming look when she got them right. She’d felt satisfied. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

After awhile, Luz started answering questions before her. And getting them _right._

It was absolutely _unbelievable!_ The human couldn’t even do magic properly, but could name all the ingredients that allowed an abomination to speak with barely a second thought?

That had been the second time Amity had lost her top student badge. The first time she’d lost it to the human.

The sparks had been lit.

Luz and her became rivals, bitter ones at that. She’d often pull all-nighters studying, hoping to get a leg up on the human, to get ahead where she’d excelled so easily before. The badge went back and forth between them week after week.

The bags under her eyes and the jealousy in her heart deepened.

Oh, the fights they had! Fights over who’s abomination was better, who’d memorized more obscure facts that week, fights that lead to angry words from both sides. Oftentimes, Amity would take it a step too far, and Luz would lean back in her chair, real hurt stinging in her eyes. 

She’d see those eyes in her sleep, fear and anger burning in them, a special concoction of hate that she reserved for Amity. The human never looked at anyone else that way, those eyes usually holding a kind softness in them. She’d seen, she knew, from across classrooms and hallways.

She’d feel, late at night-

_Doubt._

_And regret._

Eventually, the fights that Amity won felt like losses. The pride that had previously filled her turned sour, and she felt sick whenever Luz lost her fighting spirit, slumping over with a dull look in her eyes.

_Who could take pride in causing such a sweet person so much agony?_

They broke each other down, like two boulders grinding against one another over the course a thousand years, causing cracks and fractures. 

Their feud continued on, and in their third year, something terrible happened. 

A monster, just as awful as the one living in her chest, broke into school. Events like these weren’t uncommon, it was the Boiling Isles after all, but this one was different. In all the books on monsters she’d ever read, she’d never seen this one. It was a nameless, terrible thing, with boney wings, cracked, bleeding skin, eyes so soulless and dark that Amity felt the life draining from her.

She’d stood in a trace as the monster approached, until a warm hand landed on her shoulder.

_Regret._

She’d thrown Luz’s hand off in disgust, summoning a fireball to shoot at the monster’s head. It had shaken the fire off, unphased.

Amity knew then that they were in trouble.

_And doubt._

Every bit of magic that she knew, every piece of knowledge learned, she used against that thing. Luz was trying her best, throwing random glyphs against the monster. It still appeared unphased, and Amity became increasingly frustrated, taking out her anger on the human instead of the creature.

_“Try harder, will you?!”_

_“I am!”_

_“You are absolutely_ **_useless_ ** _. A child could wield magic better than you!”_

Luz had turned towards her, pain so clearly written on her face, just for an instant. Then the monster’s tail slammed into her, throwing the human against the wall, and Amity heard a sickening crack.

Luz crumpled to the ground, unmoving.

“ _No.”_

_“_ **_No!_ ** _”_

In a furious haze, she summoned another spell circle, but no spell came out. Instead, it was just… magic. Pure, unfiltered magic.

It was beautiful and terrible all the same.

The magic hit the monster, disintegrating it upon contact, and then there was nothing. No sound, no relief, no anger or fear.

Amity stumbled towards where the human lay, still crumpled. She half knelt, half fell in front of her.

A trickle of blood ran from the corner of Luz’s mouth, and those warm brown eyes were now cold, glassy and unfocused. She felt her own vision blur in and out as she realized.

Luz Noceda, dead at sixteen.

A strangled little sound escaped her lips.

_Regret._

How Amity made it home was beyond her.

How she came back to class the next week, empty, was beyond her.

Luz had become her obsession, her break in the monotony of life, a reason to push herself. Their relationship was by no means healthy, but Amity realized that she’d become dependent on the human. They’d broken each other down, but they’d also pushed each other. Now, there was nothing driving her.

Sometimes, late, late at night, when night started to shift to morning, she’d wonder-

Maybe… 

_Things could’ve been different._

They were incompatible. But, just maybe, in a different world, in a different time, they could’ve been friends.

For the first time in her life, Amity wished for the human back.

~~~

Somewhere in the universe, someone heard her wish, her plea. 

~~~

**One day, Amity Blight. You have one day to fix this, to change the events you set into motion.**

**I wish you the best of luck.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gosh, don’t you just hate it when you accidentally get your rival killed because of your own cockiness, then get teleported back to your fourteen year old self so you can prevent said rival’s death because your past self was a stupid little shit who didn’t realized how much you needed them around? Yeah, me too.
> 
> Fun fact, I had a rival in high school, and this story is loosely based around my own experiences with them. So, if you can’t already tell, my mental health and self esteem is kinda meh. :;;:;:;:)))))

The sun was warm on her face as she woke. 

Green strands of hair fell across her eyes when she blinked them open, and Amity frowned.

She’d stopped dyeing her hair over a year ago.

Amity sat up, studying her hands. They looked slightly different, but she couldn’t quite pinpoint why. The black polish was still there, however.

Raucous laughter rang out in the house, followed by two very familiar voices.

_ Ed and Em. _

The twins had also moved out a year ago.

Amity stood up, taking a glance around her room. It looked almost the same, but her old Emperors’ Coven poster still hung on the far left wall. Her frown deepened. She remembered tearing that same poster to pieces after Luz’s…  _ the incident. _

She didn’t think about Luz’s death anymore.

Instead, she called it  _ the incident,  _ because that held less weight in her head. It could’ve meant a bad test grade, or a lost Grudgby match. Something else.

Even so, after  _ the incident, _ Amity was sure she’d gotten rid of that poster, and the twins weren’t supposed to visit for another couple months. And her hair wasn’t still  _ green.  _

She made her way to the bathroom, letting out an exhale before looking into the mirror. If it wasn’t for the green hair, Amity might’ve taken a second to notice the differences.

One, obviously, the hair. She ran her fingers through the strands, puzzled. Maybe the twins had come home early and dyed her hair as a joke while she slept. She shrugged a little.

_ Wouldn’t be the first time. _

As she accepted the color change with a weary sigh, Amity looked closer into the mirror.

Two, there weren’t any dark circles under her eyes. Or, at least, they were lessened. Three, that scar she received during  _ the incident,  _ an ugly thing that cut a line from cheek to chin, wasn’t there. As she studied her face, Amity realized that she looked… younger. By a couple years, maybe. It wasn’t that much of a change, but it was enough to warrant a question.

And she had more than one.

“Oi, Mittens!”

Edric’s voice cut through the silence, and the two of them poked a head into Amity’s bathroom. She jumped, heart leaping with her as she stumbled back from the door.

_ They also look about a few years younger. _

It was true, Edric didn’t have that goatee he’d grown lately, and Emira wasn’t wearing as much makeup as usual.

“Quit staring at yourself, we’re going to be late. Have you completely turned into such a narcissist that you’re now willing to miss school?”

Still confused and slightly distracted, her answering words didn’t hold much bite.

“I’m not a narcissist, pinhead.”

Emira piped in.

“I’m sure that human would disagree with you.”

All the air rushed out of her lungs, like a fist to her stomach. She whipped her head towards her siblings, disbelief causing her mouth to fall open as she reeled.

They didn’t talk about  _ her. _

An unspoken rule that Em had just now broken, along with the barely put together pieces of her heart.

Mumbled words escaped her lips, falling out without thought.

“She disagrees with everything I say.”

_ She did. _

Ed laughed.

“She does, doesn’t she?”

The difference in tense occurred to Amity after a couple of minutes, just as the three of them stepped out the front door.

“You mean, she did.”

Both of them looked at her in confusion.

“No, I’m pretty sure I mean  _ does. _ ”

Amity’s mind raced, an impossible thought occurring to her.

“Ed, what day is it?”

Emira snorted a little in disbelief, but Edric looked a little concerned.

“November 16th.”

“What year.”

Both siblings now looked concerned. Amity waved them off and just stared Ed down, waiting for him to confirm the thought now nagging at the back of her mind.

“What year, Ed.”

“2020… are you sure you’re feeling okay?”

_ Oh. _

“Yes, I’m fine.”

Amity was most definitely  _ not  _ fine.

_ I’m fourteen.  _

_ Which means… she’s alive. _

Like a tuning fork had been driven into her brain, she heard a voice, both young and old, high pitched and a deep baritone, resonate in head.

**One day, Amity Blight. You have one day to fix this, to change the events you set into motion.**

**I wish you the best of luck.**

She grabbed her head, gritting her teeth as the words bounced around in her mind, an invasion. They both filled her with unimaginable confusion and a sense of purpose, like a mission given to her before developing a sudden bout of amnesia. She felt like she was missing something.

_ Who did this to me? _

_ What am I fixing? _

“Mittens!  _ Mittens!” _

Amity felt Emira’s hand on her shoulder, steadying her. Her eyes were wide with fear, confusion beneath it.

“Are you sure that we don’t need to take you to the healers?”

Numbly, she shook her head.

“Just… take me to school. I need to go to school.”

“Mittens, your education can wait if you’re sick.”

There it was. 

A tugging in her stomach, like a thread that was trying to pull her in the right direction. A lifeline, a rope thrown overboard, something for her to hold onto, something to guide her. She would fix something that could only be fixed now, because… 

_ Regret. _

Amity could fix  _ them.  _ She could fix her mistakes.

Couldn’t she?

_ And doubt. _

“No, school is where I need to be right now.”

“Okay, weirdo.”

She could save Luz, and maybe save herself in the process.

~~~

School was the same.

Of course it was, Amity had already experienced this version of Hexide before, this day before. As she walked into the school, she kept getting hit with little shocks of deja vu, little moments that she’d once known, but forgotten over the years.

A firework going off in the hallway, to which Bump came out of his office to yell at the student who’d set it off.

One of Amity’s classmates slipping on a puddle of abomination goo, his friends laughing while he brushed himself off, embarrassed.

Two older girls leaning against the lockers, their hands entwined with soft smiles on their faces, the sight sending an sudden ache of longing through her chest.

She’d never know love, not really. Not from her parents, never had a deep enough connection with her friends to warrant any love for them. Perhaps she felt a sisterly affection towards her siblings, though they would never shut up about it if she said so. The twins were the people Amity was closest to, actually.

It was almost sad.

That was something else she’d never experienced before Luz.

Self pity.

Amity hadn’t needed others, hadn’t needed…  _ love,  _ like she craved now, watching these happy people laugh with each other in the halls. She hadn’t looked down on herself for not having real friends, because she had her own place in the world that no one else could touch.

Then Luz had toppled her throne, filling herself with self pity, loathing, and doubt. 

Exposed the greed, jealousy, the cockiness that drove her, and drove the human into the ground.

_ I killed her. It was my fault. _

She felt a sting in the back of her throat, but welcomed it. It meant that she was changing, capable of feeling the guilt and regret, and accepting it.

_ I can fix it. _

The bell screamed, throwing Amity out of her head and back into the present. Well, past really, but that's besides the point. The point being… 

_ Oh damn it. _

Amity Blight was late to class.

Amity Blight is  _ never _ late to class.

She rushed to her first abominations class of the day, somehow managing to remember her freshman year schedule. The sound of boots echoed down the hall as she all but ran to the class.

Cautiously, Amity poked her head into the room, entering almost sheepishly when all her classmates and the teacher stared at her open mouthed.

“Late, Miss Blight? This is highly unlike you.”

She looked at him apologetically, eyes sweeping across the room.

“I’m sorry, I got…”

Her heart missed a couple beats, stumbling and stuttering in her chest when her eyes landed on Luz.

“... distracted.”

Amity had completely forgotten that the human had been in her first period class. Like the rest of them, Luz stared at her, eyebrows raised in surprise. She looked…

Well, she looked incredulous.

“Please take a seat.”

“Yes sir.”

The words were quiet and mumbled, eyes never quite leaving Luz’s as she found her desk. Amity was unable to look away, drinking in the features of the human that she’d… missed… for such a long time now. Surprising herself, she smiled a little as she took her old seat next to Luz.

“Late, Blight? Not top student behavior, I’d say.”

A teasing look appeared on her face, matching Amity’s own suddenly cheerful expression.

_ Of course. _

This was before they’d both destroyed each other, before they started fighting only out of habit rather than a desire to best the other, a cycle of anger that they’d become trapped in. This was before Luz stopped smiling at her, stopped teasing her when Amity made a mistake. Before the human only ever looked bitter whenever they were in the same room.

“Quiet, you. You’re always late.”

Luz kicked her feet up onto her desk, and the teacher shot her a glare. She scowled, swinging her legs down. A tinge of a smile still lingered on Amity’s lips.

_ Stop looking happy! She’ll think you’ve gone soft. _

“Yeah, but you’re Amity.”

This was said matter-of-factly, a true statement. But it wasn’t true. She wasn’t Amity, not this Luz’s version of Amity anyhow.

Who was the Amity Blight that Luz knew?

_ Selfish. _

_ Hot-headed. _

_ Uptight. _

_ Jealous.  _

_ Lonely. _

Not much had changed, apparently. It was probably safe to say that she’d gotten worse over the years.

There were a couple things that she would add to the list now, having lived through  _ the incident,  _ having lost her spark, her fire. Having lost Luz.

_ Tired. _

_ Empty. _

_ Lost. _

_ Regretful. _

If only Luz could know what she’d been through, how she’d felt after her death. 

“What? No snippy words today?”

Amity sighed.

“I don’t feel like fighting.”

She really didn’t.

**One day to fix this.**

Luz looked over again, slightly shocked, a curious look in her eyes that Amity no longer found the courage to meet. 

“You don’t?”

“I don’t.”

“Hmmm.”

Time slipped by too quickly after that, neither of them piping up to answer questions today. The teacher looked at both of them expectantly, disappointed when they didn’t say a word. Eventually, the bell screamed, and students lept out their seats, rushing to the door. Amity collected her own belongings, turning towards the human.

_ I should say som- _

Luz was already gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part two got longer and longer until I decided there needed to be a part three. So, ya know, look forward to that.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Amity: spills out years of grief and regret
> 
> Luz: 👁👄👁

In comparison, her other classes crawled by at snail’s pace. It was very boring, relearning things that she already knew by heart. Tired of pretending to pay attention by her third period class, Amity took out her notebook and started doodling in it. It was an absentminded activity, and she wasn’t even aware of what the drawing was until she looked down and had to stifle a scream.

A rough outline of a figure, slumped against a wall, short hair mused and eyes empty.

Amity slammed the notebook shut, drawing confused glances from around the room, but she was shaking too much to notice them. 

_I drew Luz._

_Not… alive._

She took shuddering breaths, feeling her hand clutch the pencil she was holding in a vice grip. The teacher’s voice was drowned out by the ringing in her head. 

_I’m sorry._

Amity was sorry. 

She’d never been sorry for anything in her life. Only when it came to Luz, did she feel regret for her actions.

_Why her?_

The scream of the bell released Amity from her own head and from class. Absentmindedly, she wandered to the cafeteria, not intending to get anything to eat, but had nowhere else to go for her lunch period. Hordes of students rushed past her, and she felt caught up in the crowd, a dizzying weight in her stomach.

Amity felt lost.

Nausea gripped her, and she pushed her way through the mass of students waiting for food. Glares were thrown her way when her elbows met people’s sides. 

She finally saw a break in the crowd, a sliver of light that she dove for. 

Heavy breaths and a sigh of relief escaped her lips until Amity saw who she was standing in front of. Luz looked at her with surprise, a hand half extended as if to help Amity regain her balance.

“Got caught up in the lunch rush hour? They usually all bow at your feet if you glare at them enough.”

She found that there was no retort to bite back with.

Luz grinned.

“Cat got your tongue?”

Amity felt her cheeks flush, a deluge of different emotions threatening to explode out from her. She wanted to yell at the human for being an idiot. She wanted to hit her, wanted to cry, wanted to sneer and walk away. She wanted Luz to stop looking at her like she was actually _concerned_ about Amity.

“I- um.”

_Awesome!_

_Very good, you managed to speak!_

_Now let’s try for complete sentences next time, shall we?_

“Can I talk to you?”

Luz rubbed her arm, glancing back towards Willow and Augustus, who’d caught onto their awkward conversation. 

“Aren’t we talking now?”

The feelings bubbled in her throat, making her want to laugh and scream simultaneously.

She settled for a sort of strangled huff of indignation.

“I meant where it’s a little quieter, nitwit.”

Luz looked puzzled and also slightly scared. 

Across the cafeteria, she watched Willow stand, preparing to come over. Catching her gaze, Luz turned towards her friend and waved, then pointed to Amity and gave a thumbs up. Apparently satisfied, Willow sat back down, but still eyed her with distrust.

She couldn’t blame her.

“Well, lead the way then.”

Luz rubbed her arm again, evidently uncomfortable.

Slowly, unsurely, Amity turned and headed out of the cafeteria, very aware of the human lagging behind her.

_Am I making the right decision?_

_How am I supposed to fix years of hate?_

_Even if she hasn’t gone through it all yet, she will._

The halls were empty, abandoned except for the sound of their footsteps on cheap tile.

_Can I change us?_

Amity pushed open the door of the first empty classroom she spotted.

She heard the door shut behind her, then open again as Luz hesitantly followed her in.

The classroom was dim, lit only by the sunlight filtering through the windows. As awkward silence filled the space between them, her eyes lingered on one of those tacky inspirational posters that teachers seemed to love plastering all over their walls.

**Take Action!**

“I really hope you didn’t drag me in here to finally-”

A sudden burst of warmth filled Amity’s stomach as she stepped forwards and wrapped her arms around the human. Luz stood deathly still, hands hovering at her sides for a few moments until she slowly returned the hug. 

The two of them stayed like that, and Amity tucked her face into her shoulder, feeling the warmth on her cheek.

Luz _was_ warm, warmer than anyone else she’d ever met. Maybe humans ran hotter than witches.

She pulled back ever so slightly, but Luz didn’t release her grip, still clutching the back of Amity’s shirt. Her face flushed again, and her voice came out soft.

“You can let go now.”

Luz’s chuckle vibrated against her chest.

“I’m afraid that if I do, I’m going to find the point of a knife sticking out of my stomach.”

Amity felt a horrified grimace cross her face, memories assaulting her as she shoved the human back and away from her.

_Luz’s blood, hot and thick, a dark red staining her hands. The color wouldn’t wash out for a week, lining the creases of her palms._

“Did I say something?”

_This was a mistake._

_Why could I ever believe that I could fix this?_

_That I could fix… myself._

_I’m damaged goods._

_I’m tainted, haunted by ghosts and the choices that I’ve made._

She felt something wet run down her cheek, and a warm hand on her shoulder.

“Amity… you’re crying.”

Luz stared into her eyes, a mix of confusion and concern swirling in her own.

Well, at least it wasn’t hate.

She furiously wiped the tears away, forcing herself to meet the human’s gaze. Luz frowned.

“I’m sorry.”

The human leaned away from Amity, frown deepening as she tried to process the apology. She instantly missed the warmth of the hand on her shoulder.

“Why?”

Amity huffed in disbelief.

“For everything! For hurting you, for fighting with you, for causing you nothing but agony. For treating you like you were some sort of bug, like you were insignificant and deserved to be crushed under my heel!”

Shock crossed Luz’s face, like her words were finally registering properly. Amity would’ve laughed at her expression, but the weight in her chest still hurt too much.

“But, why now?”

_By the Titan, how am I supposed to answer that?!_

_“Yeah, two years from now, I accidentally killed you, and the crushing guilt almost killed me. But I was given a chance to go back and fix us, so please believe me and don’t think that I’ve gone insane!”_

Amity was quiet for a moment.

“I’ve already waited too long.”

The silence between them turned unbearable.

“And I know this is going to sound insane, but tomorrow, I’m probably not going to remember any of this. It’s going to be just like any other day, and I’m barely going to give you a second glance.”

“... What?”

“I’m not going to remember this, and I’m not going to stop fighting with you, because I used to think I ruled the world and was above everyone and everything else.”

“Hang on, hang on, used to? Amity, you’re not making sense.”

She shot Luz a glare, and the human paled, raising her hands up in surrender.

“Yes, Luz, I used to. Because I’m not Amity, not the Amity you know anyhow, and your Amity could never have the guts to apologize to you.”

Amity shifted her eyes up, and saw Luz staring at her with an indecipherable expression. She could see her straining to stay quiet, mouth pressed shut tightly and eyebrows furrowed. 

“You don’t have to believe me, you can think that I’m insane. That’s okay.”

Luz looked at her dead in the eyes.

“I don’t think you’re insane. I just don’t understand why you’re telling me this.”

She felt a spike of pain in her chest, seeing Luz’s dead form crumpled against the wall. Dead Luz and this Luz blended together as tears formed in her eyes again, vision blurring.

“Because I made a mistake. I’ve made so _many_ mistakes.”

Amity wiped the tears out of her eyes.

“Please, just try tomorrow. Be patient with me. I can change, I just need a reason too. And I’m sorry for the pain I’m going to cause you.”

“Ami…”

“I like Good Witch Azura too! I only ever bullied you about it because Boscha and Skara don’t know, and they think it’s lame. I admire you, and your ability to learn new things so fast. I’m… jealous of you.”

Unshed tears lingered in her eyes as she started rambling, to do anything to make Luz stop looking at her like _that._ The human looked unsure, disbelief apparent, a mixture of pity and concern in her eyes.

She took a step towards her, a plea in her voice.

“Luz… please, try tomorrow. Give me a second chance. And a third. And a fourth, until you break down my walls. Please, kept trying. That’s what I admire so much about you. You never stop _trying.”_

Amity buried her face into her hands, finally letting the tears flow freely.

_There._

_I’ve done all I can._

She felt a pair of arms wrap around her shoulders, warm and comforting. Her voice came out in a choked sort of half-sob.

“Please, _forgive me.”_

A hand reached out to brush a strand of hair away from Amity’s face and tuck it behind her ear. She glanced up, to find Luz looking at her with a determined expression.

“Okay, I’ll try.”

A small hiccup escaped her lips as she stared at the human with wide eyes. 

_Titan can only know how pitiful I look right now._

“You will?”

“I will.”

“... Thank you, Luz.”

~~~

She collapsed in her bed, emotionally and physically strung out.

_Did I do enough?_

_Was it enough?_

_It has to be._

In a half-haze, Amity leaned over and grabbed an abandoned pen that had rolled near her bed. Uncapping it, she scrawled a note on her arm.

**Amity, listen to Luz. Stop being so stuck up.**

Smiling a little, she dropped the pen and turned off her light.

Sleep came all too quickly.

_~~~_

The sun woke her again, the soft light filtering through her closed eyes.

Man, she needed to get a better pair of blinds.

A chime from her scroll made Amity turn her head and grab it, smile creeping its way across her face when she saw who it was from.

  
  


**Luz 8:34 am:** corazón, i really hope you went to bed at a reasonable time 

**Luz 8:34 am:** you’re going to ace that test, as usual 

  
  


**Amity 8:35 am:** Because I study, darling.

**Amity 8:36 am:** And good morning to you too.

  
  


**Luz 8:36 am:** 😋

  
  


She let out a laugh, setting her scroll down.

Something nagged at the back of her brain, like a dream forgotten. Amity frowned, the feeling not entirely pleasant. There was a lingering sense of guilt, of regret, almost like a bad memory forcible forgotten.

She looked back at her scroll, a sudden and almost overwhelming wave of thankfulness washing over her when she looked at Luz’s contact. Impulsively, she typed out a quick message.

  
  


**Amity 8:39 am:** I love you.

  
  


**Luz 8:40 am:** i love you too 😊

Her cheeks warmed with fondness for the human, and Amity set her scroll down once more, preparing for school.

The odd feeling faded away.

As she stepped out of the room, ready to leave for the day, her eyes lingered on her calendar, and something like deja vu struck her.

Today was November 16th, 2022.

A completely normal day.

Amity just shrugged her shoulders, confused by the inner workings of her brain, and finally left the room.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was actually inspired by Your Name, because I watched that movie for the first time the other day, bawled my eyes out for like 30 minutes after it ended, and then immediately started writing fan fiction.


End file.
